Ever been Asian in a crowded subway?

I was riding the subway back from around Seoul yesterday evening (I had to go there to shop for sandals to wear in school because they don't sell the size 12s I need anywhere else), and there were so many people on the subway train that I was lucky to find a handhold near the door. As we took off on the hour-and-a-half subway ride back to the station near my house, I stood there in this crowded subway car barreling through the tunnels, the lights flashing by the windows, everyone else talking and laughing and showing each other what they bought, and all of a sudden, I got this strange feeling.

I was alone. It really hit me like a brick, this feeling that I might as well have been riding that train with no one else around. The four teenagers at the far end of the train were laughing with each other over their friend's purchase of a pink cell phone cover. The young adult couple in the seat I was standing closest to were having a dispute about whether to see a movie or go bowling that night with friends. The elderly woman in the "special seating" section at the front of the car was leaning her head on her husband, apparently sleeping. And without warning, I began to picture some of my friends being there with me, to laugh with, talk with, argue with, and all that stuff that we so easily take for granted. Then I started to think about some of the stupid stuff I've done with them, and the great times we'd spent together, and especially some of the tough talks we've had. And all of a sudden, without warning, I was alone on that train. I don't mean to sound melodramatic, I'm simply being honest about how I felt right then.

But in the very next moment, I caught myself, and realized that I was still too preoccupied thinking only of myself and my situation, that I could very well be missing important opportunities to show love to others here. And the only reason I wrote about me feeling lonely is because it immediately led to the redirection of my feelings and sentiments of being here.

Yes, I'm away from my family. Yes, I don't have very many friends here, and the very few I do have so far live too far away to see on a regular basis. Yes, it gets very lonely very quickly for me. But I also know I mustn't lose focus on the reason God has me here in this place, at this moment.

Also, as a short update, I'm teaching at the local elementary and middle schools near where I live, and the teachers have been very nice and welcoming. The kids I teach are awesome (most of them), and the majority of them love to ask questions, especially of American life (although I'm still having a tough time answering the question, "Why do American Burger Kings serve triple Whoppers?" Someone help me out?). And the food here is awesome! I'm actually looking forward to trying anything new they want to give me here. Just last week, I had octopus tentacles that were still moving (I definitely recommend it for the less-squimish). As before, though, I miss everyone back home, and I can't wait until I get a chance to come back. Take care, everyone.